Photo: Courtesy Kenyan women in the Diaspora have a problem with Kenyan men. Romantic relationships between Kenyans in the US, for instance, are beset with untold challenges. The Nairobian spoke to a of women of different ages and careers who concur that relationships are not working and Kenyan men should take a big chunk of the blame.
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Sarah Mwangi, an auditor with a top auditing firm and whose is quite impressive, says Kenyan men may be intelligent, but they lack a certain charm that women value and cherish: ambition. Sarah is not alone. Greener pastures Chero Leitich notes that dating has not been as rewarding and her expectations have been shrinking each passing day.
Currently, she is seeing someone and hopes it will herald a new chapter in her life by dating someone of a different race and nationality. Chero who hails from Nakuru vows never to date a Kenyan man in the Diaspora. Her public admission is a feeling many Kenyan women in the Diaspora privately share.
She always felt limited to Kenyan standards while she was willing to pursue standards in American where, sadly, there is one man for every five women. In addition, she feels dating kenyan girls she had little say in the relationship because Kenyan men do dating kenyan girls like a woman who is outspoken or opinionated. Chero adds that Kenyan men in the Diaspora are not motivated, lack ambition and are comfortable in circles where they only drink and have barbeques.
She adds that Kenyan men in the Diaspora leave it to the women to work, which should not be the case. Rebecca Musau, who works as nurse in Washington DC agrees. I know some in their 40s with no men or kids in their lives. They have money but no man.
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It is not easy to get a white or American man. They are too busy just like everyone is in America. Another challenge is that the available Kenyan men, especially the older ones, are married either in the US or back home. White and African-American men are hardly available, hence most women either decide to stay single or become single mums.
But are men entirely to blame? Many in the Diaspora agree that women adapt easily to the American environment compared to men.
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Do you think such a woman will dating kenyan girls about or respect the husband? With rights, freedom and money, women are no longer subjected to the directions of their men as is the case in Kenya. With such freedom, you can understand the runaway infidelity that has become the order of the day here, explains Rebecca. Individual preferences Sonie Kendi, who recently moved to Indiana, thinks that despite the allegations, it boils down to individual preferences. She has been in the US for four months now.
What influences the choices according to Sonie is the cultural background of individuals since the two cultures are worlds apart.
Save for those who immigrate dating kenyan girls on the Green Card, many Kenyans come here as students or visitors. It is the reason many men and women often gravitate towards Americans in the hope that they can marry them and streamline to legalise they stay find jobs. Yet, even those who immigrate on the Green Card are divorcing at alarming levels. Men unable to keep up with liberal culture There are a myriad of reasons why marriages and relationships are not working in the US. Kenyan men find it difficult to keep up with the liberal culture, which Kenyan women take to like ducks to water.
It is very individualistic.
Why kenyan women are having a hard time finding love in the diaspora
And if you find yourself in a town without any Kenyan, you will hardly have a social support system. Furthermore, America changes the way one thinks. Those who cannot change their mindset cannot withstand the pressure. Before you settle with anyone, there must be a catch.
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At the end of the day, Kenyans and Africans must accept that they can never be per cent equal with the whites. Those who discover this early, go back to those they are familiar with: their fellow Kenyans or other Africans. By David Odongo and Jalango Njago 5 years ago.
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